One of my favorite games when I was growing up was the Game of Life. I used to play it for hours at a time with my next door neighbor David. We always laughed hysterically when one of us got the card taht read: "Congratulations -- you've just had twins!"
Now we're both grown and we're playing the real game of life. David has a new wife and a promising career as an insurance agent, and I have a worn-out husband and a set of twins.
It's funny, when I used to think about what I would be when I grew up, I never once considered becoming the mother of twins. I always thought that if I ever had any kids at all, I would have them one at a time, like most of the other parents I knew. But things never seem to happen that way for me.
Before the twins arrived husband Phillip used to ask me, "When are we going to have kids like everyone else?" We were married eight years the last time he asked me that question. Eight-and-a-half months later I presented him with an instant family -- a boy and a girl -- and he hasn't asked me a question like that since.
Instead he asks: "When are they going ot stop doing all that stuff and become human?"
That's a good question. What is human anyway? After almost four years at home with Greg and Jenny, I'm not sure I know anymore. Surely anyone who can go to bed at 8, stay awake until 10 singing hte alphabet, wet the bed two times between 12 and 2, make three trips to the bathroom -- with Mommy's assistance of course -- between 3 and 5 and then wake up at 6 a.m. sharp, bright-eyed adn filled with the energy of 50 wild horses couldn't be human, right? Now multiply that by two and it's easy to see why I never get much sleep. (Note: I had been up most of the night before this column phot was taken.)
Having twins in the family is not all bad. They have each other to play with adn taht can be a blessing -- when they're not fighting. At least I have yet to hear the question, "Momma, what can I do now?"
Another good think about having twins is they have the same birthday. Usually one party and an extra big cake will do instead of two parties and cakes that children of different birthdays would require.
If there's one thing I know for sure it's that life is never boring with twins around. And there's really nothing like waking up on a Saturday morning with four little hands patting your cheek and two little voices saying, "Momma, ti's time to watch the Smurfs!" So what if it's only 6 a.m. and the Smurf show comes on at 9?
You may be thinking that twins could never happen to you, and you're probably right. I used to think the same thing. Actually, if you are planning on having a family, you have only a one in a 100 chance of producing own set of twins.
Just remember this from now on: When you play the Game of Life, try not to laugh too hard when you get that funny card. What you read there might come true.
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Copyright 1983 by Donny Seagraves. No reprints without permission of the author.
This column was my first published adult writing. It appeared (in a longer version) in the March 24, 1983 issue of The Athens Observer, an alternative weekly newspaper that was much-read and much-loved by many Athenians. My editor there was Phil Williams who today is well-known as the novelist Philip Lee Williams.